Friday, September 12, 2008

Required Reading for All Who Face Trouble (In Other Words, for ALL)

As a writer, St. Thomas More’s best known literary work is Utopia, which some people cite for the foolish and insulting proposition that this roaring lion of two-fisted cool supported the repellent and downright anti-Catholic practices, like euthanasia, that he describes in his non-existent society. Ironically, as Gerald B. Wegemer notes in his introduction to A Dialogue of Comfort against Tribulation (Scepter Publishers, 2005), Utopia, a Latin work, has long been more accessible to English-speaking readers than More’s English works – because the language has sailed on, leaving the English of More’s time far behind, shrouded in mists of unintelligibility. It takes special training, and plenty of patience, to decipher the crazy spelling and archaic vocabulary of More’s pre-Shakespearean language. I myself have never tried to read more than a few lines of his original, un-updated work, even though, as an undergraduate, I studied the even older and crazier Middle English dialects of Chaucer and the Pearl Poet. But Mary Gottschalk’s rendition of the Dialogue into modern English is highly readable: at no time does she get in the way or blunt the force of More’s uncluttered mind, his penetrating logic, his keen wit, or the sense of humor and good cheer that not even the headsman and his axe, overshadowing him as he wrote, could repress.

The Dialogue is set in Hungary on the eve of Suleiman the Magnificent’s invasion of that Christian country, which took place in 1526. The conversation takes place between Vincent, a young man stricken with fear of the ferocious Turks, and his elderly uncle Anthony, wise with the wisdom of the Christian who stands on the threshold of death. Vincent – the figure of More’s family, tormented by his persecution at the hands of Henry VIII – turns to Anthony – the figure of More himself – for advice on how to find consolation, strength and perseverance in the midst of the woes that loom over their country and above all, threaten their faith. Anthony begins with an analysis of true comfort, showing that it is grounded solely in the Christian faith, which in turn affords a true understanding of the medicinal value of suffering and the merits of suffering patiently borne. He then discusses the temptations against perseverance, and their cures; the danger of attachment to worldly goods; the true nature of imprisonment and death, the realization of which is an antidote to fear. The Dialogue culminates in a comparison of the fleeting torments of earth to the everlasting and unremitting pains of Hell, followed by a description of the unimaginable joys of heaven, that will instantly drown out even the greatest earthly suffering.

More’s logic is elegant and straightforward. His insights seem so obvious in the telling that we are apt to forget that they are actually the product of a highly disciplined mind, in turn the product of years of not only intense study and practice, but prayer and mortification. Consider, for example, his response to the then-new Protestant doctrine against the need for penance, reparation and sorrow for sin:
Now, Nephew, as I told you the other day, I will not dispute these matters with those upstarts. But surely, for my own part, I cannot very well go along with them, because as far as my poor mind can see, God’s holy Scripture is very plainly against them. And the whole body of Christendom in all Christian regions, including the ones in which they themselves live, has always, down to their own day, clearly believed against them. And all the ancient, holy doctors of the Church have consistently taught against them, and all the ancient, holy interpreters have construed Scripture against them. So if these new people have just now, at this late date, discovered that Scripture has been misunderstood for all this time, and that of all those holy doctors of old, not one could understand it correctly, then I at this age am too old to begin to study it now. And trust in these people’s knowledge, Nephew? That I would in no way dare to do. For I see no reason to think that these people might not now, in their understanding of Scripture, be as deceived as they tell us everyone else has been for all this time.
From the Master he served so well on earth, More learned the art of parables, using them effectively to clarify the truths he teaches in the Dialogue. His illustration of the sin of presumption sends a chill down the spine:
There’s a story about a fellow who always used to say, “As long as I live I’ll do as I please, for when I die, three or four words will make everything safe enough.” Well, it so happened that long before this fellow could get old, his horse stumbled on a broken bridge. He tried hard to rescue them both, but soon he saw that it would not be. He knew he would be flung headlong into the river below. And in sudden agitation he cried out, as he was falling, “Well, I’ll be damned!” So there he was, drowned with his three or four deathbed words on which, for all his wretched life, he had hung all his hope.
Very intense stuff. But dire solemnity is not More’s style, even in the shadow of his own impending violent death. A lightness of heart befitting a thoroughly convinced Christian shines throughout the Dialogue; and although he engages in serious and sharp reasoning, the Dialogue is leavened throughout with the wit and humor that accompanied the saint all the way to the block. I laughed out loud at another of More’s descriptions of the sin of presumption:
There are also some, I say, who are reluctant to die because they lack good sense. These people believe in the world that is to come, and they hope to go there one day; yet they love so much the wealth of this world, and such things in it that delight them, that they will fight tooth and nail to keep them as long as they possibly can. And when they see themselves allowed in no way to keep that wealth any longer, when death comes to take them away from it, then, for lack of anything better, they will consent to be – as soon as they are gone – hoisted up to heaven and placed right next to God.
More has a delightful way of playing with words. On the chance that a person who refuses to give his life for his faith may “perhaps” afterward attain forgiveness, he warns, playfully yet pointedly:
All his forgiveness hinges, Nephew, as you clearly see, on this “perhaps.” A “perhaps” can turn into a “yes,” but it can also turn into a “no.” And then where is he? And besides, as you well know, per no kind of haps will he happen to permanently escape from death – the very thing for fear of which he forsook his faith.
Although he does lament the need for levity to break up meditation on even the joys of heaven, which our carnal nature regards as tedious, and recommends humor as sauce rather than as meat, More is not above breaking up his own serious subject matter with funny stories, apparently derived from his own domestic life. Witness Vincent’s tale of a relative and her long-suffering husband:
This woman’s husband took much pleasure in the attitude and behavior of another honorable man, and therefore spent a lot of time with him. In fact, more often than not, he was away from home at mealtime. Well, one day it happened that both he and his wife dined with that neighbor of theirs, and she playfully picked a fight with this man for making her husband feel so happy elsewhere that she could never keep him at home. “Actually, ma’am,” he said (for he had a dry sense of humor), “nothing keeps him in my company but just one thing. Give him the same thing, and he’ll never be away from you.” “What wonderful thing might that be?” our relative then asked. “Indeed, ma’am,” he said, “your husband dearly loves to talk, and when he’s with me I let him have all the words.” “ALL the words?” she asked. “Well,” she said, “I’m quite willing and content to let him have all the words just as he’s always had them – which is, I speak them all myself and give them all to him. In that way, for all I care, he can still have them all. But to say that in some other way he shall have them all – you can keep him forever, rather than he get the half!”
Or Uncle Anthony’s story of the confession of the nagging wife:
…a certain nagging wife, when she came home from confession one day, told her husband [what] she was going to do. “Cheer up, man,” she said, “for today, thanks be to God, I made a very good confession and got thoroughly absolved. So now I intend to stop all my old nagging, and star over afresh!”
More clearly understood that a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down, and he used it to great effect.

When I was a kid, there were few things I hated worse than writing a book report. They weren’t as bad during my college years, when I was working toward my degree in English, though they were still onerous, mostly because I was being made to do them. Now that I am all grown up, and at the service of accused criminals rather than professors, I write book reports for fun. I suppose it’s because I enjoy the books in question so much that I want others to read them also, and get as much out of them as I have. The Dialogue of Comfort against Tribulation is one such book.

But the day I start doing story problems for fun, somebody better book me a straitjacket and a corner in the rubber room.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Yet Another Reason Not to Vote for Obama

...as if we needed more beyond his radical leftism, his suport of infanticide, his colossal ignorance, his staggering stupidity, his nutjob cohorts, and his appeal to people who specialize in Soviet-style art.

Now we are favored with World Opinion, which favors Obama over McCain. According to ABC News, 23,531 responded to a BBC poll in on the question of preferred candidates for the American presidency in Australia, Brazil, Canada, China, Egypt, France, Germany, India, Indonesia, Italy, Kenya, Lebanon, Mexico, Nigeria, Panama, the Philippines, Poland, Russia, Singapore, Turkey, the UAE, Britain and the United States. The majority of respondents in each of these countries apparently favors Obama, and thinks U.S. relations with the rest of the world will improve if he is elected.

In other words, "the world," as represented by the respondents to this poll who hope Obama gets elected, wish the worst for a nation that:
  • Produces enough food to feed itself and the rest of the world.
  • Makes it possible for many of the above countries to sleep peacefully at night without fear of foreign invasion, and without having to contribute significantly to their own defense.
  • Rushes, with the most up-to-the-minute rescue and medical technology, to the scenes of natural disasters in countries utterly incapable of coping on their own.
  • Has given back territory captured in war (e.g., Okinawa, Iwo Jima and other territory wrested from the Axis powers in World War II), and rebuilt conquered nations (e.g., Japan, Germany).
  • Twice, in the last hundred years, saved Europe from aggressive tyrants.
  • Takes in refugees from oppression in other countries.
  • Tolerates effronteries and insults from pipsqueak nations that, if directed at the Soviet Union, might have resulted in Soviet tanks rolling over the borders of said pipsqueak nations.
So we give a silver-plated rat's ass who the rest of the world wants in our White House...why?

Monday, September 08, 2008

Friday, September 05, 2008

Been Sick...AND TIRED...

...not to mention, busy busy busy, which is hard to be when you're sick and tired. But I'm over the worst, so thanks for bearing with me.

P.S. I have built up a rather extensive archive; take a romp through the Victory Garden!

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Another Book Meme!

I wasn't tagged for this, but what the hell. I was an English major; I love to read; and this is about books. The ones I've read are in bold, the ones I'd like to read are highlighted. I did make one modification: for the sake of space, any book I haven't heard of I took out. Fr. Erik has the full list.

1. Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice. Hated it when I had to read it in high school, loved it when I read it later as a mature adult. Could care less that Mark Twain hated Jane Austen's writings, even though I really like Mark Twain.
2. J.R.R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings trilogy. Lost count of the number of times I have read this at about 35. The movies drove me nuts because of all the deviations from plot and characters.
3. Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre. Read it and appreciated it more in adulthood than during my kid years, but it is still quite a dark story.
4. J.K. Rowling, the Harry Potter series. Haven't read them, don't particularly want to.
5. Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird. Loved this when I was a kid, though I haven't read it for years and years.
6. The Bible. If I haven't read it, I'm in a lot of trouble.
7. Emily Brontë, Wuthering Heights. Heathcliff is a sociopath.
8. George Orwell, Nineteen Eighty Four. Had to read it in junior high. Every kid should have to read it in junior high.
9. Charles Dickens, Great Expectations.
10. Louisa May Alcott, Little Women.
11. Thomas Hardy, Tess of the D'Urbervilles. Angel Clare, like others of Hardy's characters, is a dink.
12. Joseph Heller, Catch 22.
13. Complete Works of Shakespeare. I have read from them; not read all of them.
14. Daphne Du Maurier, Rebecca.
15. J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit. Of course!
16. J.D. Salinger, Catcher in the Rye. Read it in high school. Hated it. Found it tawdry and sordid.
17. George Eliot, Middlemarch.
18. Margaret Mitchell, Gone With The Wind. I think the movie was enough for me.
19. F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby. Read it in high school. Jazz Age sophisticates making a complete hash out of life for themselves and others.
20. Charles Dickens, Bleak House. Though I like Dickens, I haven't read this one.
21. Leo Tolstoy, War and Peace. The length of the book doesn't deter me; just haven't got a huge desire to read it.
22. Douglas Adams, The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Read this in college (not on the reading list, just wanted to). I don't remember much about it except that it was quite funny.
23. Evelyn Waugh, Brideshead Revisited.
24. Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Crime and Punishment. Just haven't got the urge to read Russian novelists.
25. John Steinbeck, The Grapes of Wrath. Read it in high school; found it and all the other works of John Steinbeck that I had to read depressing.
26. Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland. Never saw the movie, either.
27. Kenneth Grahame, The Wind in the Willows. Tried to read it, couldn't get into it.
28. Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina. Once again, just not into Russian novelists.
29. Charles Dickens, David Copperfield. Read it in adulthood and found it excellent.
30. C.S. Lewis, Chronicles of Narnia. Nope, haven't read it, though I like C.S. Lewis.
31. Jane Austen, Emma. One of these days, I hope to get around to reading this, as I really like Jane Austin.
32. Jane Austen, Persuasion. Haven't read the book, but I really liked the movie with Ann Rice and Ciaran Hinds.
33. Arthur Golden, Memoirs of a Geisha. Zero desire.
34. A.A. Milne, Winnie the Pooh. Never read this. Did read the Raggedy Ann books.
35. George Orwell, Animal Farm. Four legs good, two legs better!
36. Dan Brown, The Da Vinci Code. I saw the movie, and it was crap. That was enough of a waste of money.
37. Wilkie Collins, The Woman in White. The only thing I really know about Wilkie Collins is that Mark Twain once upbraided him for praising James Fenimore Cooper, which frankly, he deserved.
38. L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables. Never read the books, saw the miniseries.
39. Thomas Hardy, Far From The Madding Crowd. Thomas Hardy wasted enough of my time with Tess of the D'Urbervilles and Jude the Obscure for me to want to read any more of his stuff.
40. Margaret Atwood, The Handmaid's Tale. I actually had to read this in (Catholic) high school. I wasn't old enough to read it then, and I'm still not old enough to read it now.
41. William Golding, Lord of the Flies. Zero desire.
42. Frank Herbert, Dune. Saw the movies, of course.
43. Jane Austen, Sense and Sensibility. Excellent book; the movie wasn't so bad either, even though Emma Thompson was a little long in the tooth to be playing Eleanor.
44. Charles Dickens, A Tale Of Two Cities. Another excellent Dickens classic.
45. Aldous Huxley, Brave New World. I'm very much afraid there are a lot of people who would like to live in it.
50. John Steinbeck, Of Mice and Men. Read it in high school; hated it (see The Grapes of Wrath above).
51. Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita. I couldn't have put it better than Fr. Richsteig: "I avoid porn even when it masquarades as literature."
52. Alexandre Dumas, The Count of Monte Cristo. I tried to read this after reading The Three Musketeers, but failed.
53. Thomas Hardy, Jude the Obscure. Had to read this for my Victorian Lit class in college. Couldn't stand it. Was especially maddened by the fact that I was being propped up to sympathize with complete morons who were presented to me as tragic-romantic heroes, when what they really were was arrantly stupid.
54. Herman Melville, Moby Dick. No real motivation to read it.
55. Charles Dickens, Oliver Twist. Read and enjoyed it in adulthood.
56. Bram Stoker, Dracula. Vampires really aren't my bag.
57. Frances Hodgson Burnett, The Secret Garden.
58. James Joyce, Ulysses. I think I had to read this in high school, but I remember nothing of it.
59. Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar. No desire.
60. William Makepeace Thackeray, Vanity Fair.
61. Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol. Who hasn't seen one of the many movie adaptations? But oddly enough, I have never actually read the book.
62. Alice Walker, The Color Purple. Pure filth.
63. Kazuo Ishiguro, The Remains of the Day. Saw the movie, never read the book. Thought the characters in the movie were too stupid for me to want to read the book.
64. Gustave Flaubert, Madame Bovary. Read it in high school. Hated it, notwithstanding Flaubert's le mot juste.
65. E.B. White, Charlotte's Web. Loved this so much as a kid, and read it so many times, my parents tried to take it away from me.
66. Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes. Some of my absolute favorite bedtime reading -- I actually have a volume of the complete Sherlock Holmes stories. My five favorites: The Hound of the Baskervilles; The Sign of Four; "The Musgrave Ritual"; "The Adventure of the Priory School"; "The Adventure of Charles Augustus Milverton".
67. Joseph Conrad, Heart of Darkness. Just have no desire.
68. Antoine De Saint-Exupery, The Little Prince.
69. Richard Adams, Watership Down. No desire.
70. Alexandre Dumas, The Three Musketeers. Read this in adulthood; actually had to labor to get through it.
71. Roald Dahl, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Never had a desire to read this.
72. Victor Hugo, Les Miserables. Never read the book, never saw the play.
73 Mark Twain, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. Who didn't have to read this in high school?

Anybody who wants to be tagged, go for it. (I'm sure somebody I know would have a different list.)

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Bummer, Man: The Fuzz Cracks Down

Pursuant to ancient tradition, the Name of God has been declared off-limits in the Catholic liturgy. And so now Rome has officially consigned to the ash-heap of history all the hippy-dip, '60s- and '70s-style Yahweh tunes, including, but not limited to, the following:


-- Dan Schutte, "Yahweh the Faithful One": Yahweh's love will last forever/His faithfulness till the end of time/Yahweh is a loving yawn -- whoops, I mean, God.
-- Weston Priory, "Yahweh [is the God of my salvation": Verse 2: Be with us, Lord, as we break through with each other/to find the truth and beauty of each friend. Huh????

-- Dan Schutte (again), "Sing a New Song": Yahweh's people dance for joy/Wreathed all in baggy crepe/Fat women leap in leotards/We all just sit and gape...

-- Michael Joncas, "Let the King of Glory Come": Who is the King of glory?/Yahweh, holy and strong!/Who is the Lord of Majesty?/Yahweh, mighty and strong! Shish-boom-bah!
-- Dan Schutte (yet again), "Yahweeeeeeeeehhh, I Knoooowww You are Neeeeaaaaarrrrrr": 'Nuff said.

Now if only we could acquire a similar respect for God's Word, and quit cramming Bible texts -- especially the Psalms -- into ill-fitting, inferior and just plain crappy musical arrangements.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Prayer Alert: The Fitzpatricks

Please pray for Bonnie and Les Fitzpatrick, OPL, and their family. Bonnie's mother just had a major heart attack, and the outlook is not good.

St. John of God (not pictured to the right; that's El Greco's portrait of St. Dominic)) is the patron of heart patients. Herewith a prayer for his intercession:

Dear Convert, after a sinful life, through the power of God's holy Word you learned to love your fellow human beings. Self-sacrificing, you founded the Society of Hospital Brothers. No wonder the Church made you the patron of patients and nurses. That is why we confidently have recourse to you. Please give assistance to Bonnie's mother, and teach us to be kind like you. Amen.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Fr. Shady Tree and His Acorns

The Curt Jester describes -- whoops! I mean, SHARES -- his experiences while visiting at another parish:

The Mass was said by an Irish priest who started with what I guess you could call a census (people never learn from King David). "How many of you are from out of town?" pretty much everybody raised their hands. "How many of you are from outside the U.S.?" He then proceeded down the isle extracting country of origin from a number of people who raised their hands. We are no five minutes into the Mass. Next it was "How many are married over 50 years please stand up." Followed by encouragement for applause and then "Stand up if you are a grandparent" Here he inserts mandatory joke about them being free babysitters." Then we had the "everybody introduce yourself to the people around you ." I had heard of this practice at some parishes, but never had to suffer through this false bit of community that has everybody glad handing the other (I though this was reserved for the Kiss of Peace). We are now ten minutes into the start of Mass and we haven't even got to the confeitor yet.
Then, the killer question-slash-reality check:

Now if priests are going to act like a Vegas lounge act can I also be a heckler?

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

What Did They Expect?

Some "traditional" members of the canonically suppressed St. Stanislaus Kostka parish in St. Louis, Missouri are unnerved at the direction the former parish is being taken by the increasingly kooky Fr. Marek Bozek, who is in the process of being defrocked after participating in the "ordination" of some priestesses in November.

In 2005, Bozek was "hired" by the parish out of the Diocese of Springfield-Cape Girardeau, whose bishop promptly suspended him for abandoning his post without leave, thereby depriving him of the exercise of his priestly office. Hailed as the "savior" of St. Stanislaus, which was -- and is -- embroiled in a feud with the Archdiocese of St. Louis over control of the parish, Bozek went on to pursue his bizarre vision of a "Catholic Church" that ordains women, abolishes the clerical discipline of celibacy, and blesses gay unions. His program for a "church" that makes no moral demands on its adherents has attracted hordes of left-wing ideologues and malcontents to his congregation, a development that some welcome as a purported gathering of lost sheep into the fold.

Meanwhile, Bozek increasingly gives himself over, not only to crass materialism (e.g., a 143% salary hike, a luxury apartment and a brand-new BMW) but to delusions of grandeur, having bought a silver bishop's ring and openly declared his "willingness" to serve as the bishop of a new "underground" church. He has revealed that he has been in "talks" with schismatic and heretical groups like Married Priests Now! -- headed by former "married" archbishop Emmanuel Malingo, who has gone over to the Moonies -- and something called "the Therese of Divine Peace Inclusive Community," headed by two "Catholic" priestesses. Seeing that these overtures do not sit well with at least part of his congregation, Bozek downplays them and insists that St. Stan's will remain Catholic.

Rationalizing his moral infidelity and his apparent thirst for power and prestige, Bozek declares: "The Roman Catholic family can be described today as dysfunctional, toxic or abusive. For decades we have allowed the men who claim to be our shepherds to abuse us." Yet, although in formal schism, Bozek denies being the spiritual offspring of Martin Luther. "No one has an ambition to create a new denomination," he claims. "My vision is to be Roman Catholic and wait for the regime to collapse."

At long last, some parishioners at St. Stanislaus Kostka are viewing developments in their parish with alarm. Yet nothing that has come to pass there has been unforeseeable. In his open letter to the parishioners of St. Stanislaus and to the faithful of his archdiocese, Archbishop Raymond Burke notes, with the precision of a laser scalpel, that "those who choose to go into schism believe that they can be the Church without the pastoral teaching, ministration of the sacraments and governance of the Apostles and their successors." Indeed. Pursuant to canon law, all of the sacraments now celebrated at St. Stanislaus are illicit, if not invalid, as the Archbishop explains:

The ordained priest who goes into schism...is...rendered irregular for the exercise of Holy Orders (cf. can. 1044, §1, 2º). In other words, he may not exercise the Sacrament of Holy Orders which he has received. Any Mass celebrated by a suspended and excommunicated priest is valid, but illicit. To knowingly and willingly celebrate the Holy Mass, when one is legitimately prohibited from doing so, is a most grave sin. A priest under the penalty of excommunication does not give valid sacramental absolution (cf. can. 966, §1). Neither can he validly officiate at a wedding (cf. can. 1108, §1).

The celebration of the Sacrament of Confirmation by a schismatic priest is invalid because he no longer has any faculty to do so, either by universal Church law or the granting of the faculty by the diocesan bishop (cf. can. 882). Baptism and the Anointing of the Sick are conferred validly but not licitly (cf. cann. 862; and 1003, §§1-2).

The faithful who approach a schismatic priest for the reception of the sacraments, except in the case of danger of death, commit a mortal sin.

In other words, by continuing on the way they are going, the schismatics and those they have lured out of the state of grace are either receiving no sacraments at all; or else, such valid sacraments as they do receive serve merely to compound their guilt. Such is the fate of all who buy into the false dichotomy between Christ and His Church.

At the Last Supper, Jesus admonished His disciples that He was the vine, and they were the branches, and that if they were to bear any fruit, they must remain in Him. The people of St. Stanislaus are finding out the hard way that when you cut yourself off from the True Vine, you not only don't bear any fruit; you also fall into the hands of a nutjob.

If the "traditional" parishioners really want to be traditional, and lay authentic claim to that title, they can only do so by returning to Rome. May the real St. Stanislaus Kostka, who received Holy Communion (validly and licitly) from angels, obtain the reconciliation of these misguided people with the true Church.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Ho-Hum

In China, there is no freedom of religion. Big deal.

In China, there is no freedom of peaceable assembly. So what?

In China, there is no right to petition the government for a redress of grievances. Whatever.

In China, there is no freedom of speech. Yawn.

In China, political dissent is a crime, and those who are accused of crimes have no right to due process. And your point is...?

Today we find out that at the Olympic opening ceremonies, the Chi-Coms faked a performance by a cute little girl in pigtails, who lip-synched a patriotic song as the Communist flag was brought into the arena. The world rises to its feet in indignation.

What a blow to the image of Red China.